One year anniversary of The Xiphister!

It’s hard to believe I have been playing around with The Xiphister blog for a full year now. I wanted to take the one-year anniversary of the blog to thank those of you who have visited, especially those who have commented and given feedback on things I have posted. It’s nice to know that people actually read and are entertained by the things I put up on here. I also wanted to give you a state-of-the-blog so you know what to expect over the next year.

The original intent of the blog was to provide a platform for me to write about movies and other interesting things. I’ve posted movie reviews, shared a few trailers, talked about some of my concert adventures, and tried to introduce you to some cool stuff such as film concept art, new books to read, and brain controlled cat ears.

It’s been a fun year, and I have learned a lot about my new hobby. I think that I’m getting better as a blogger and hope that I will continue to improve as a writer and as a judge of content. I want to post things that you guys find interesting and do it in a way that is entertaining and informative. One reason why I encourage readers to comment on every article is so that I can use the feedback to improve. Let me know what you think, good, bad, or ugly!

Over the past year, I have posted 135 articles and have had about 4,400 page views. The majority of the posts get only a handful of views, but a few have been popular and have driven a lot of traffic to the blog. The most popular posts were about the scientific errors in the film Battleship, the beautiful art in the book Prometheus: The Art of the Film, and why time travel can’t work. My monthly movie previews also get a lot of views and are one of my favorite pieces on the blog.

I joined Twitter in January and use the account to share the work I’m doing on the blog. I also tweet out random thoughts about the movies I’m watching, comment on film industry news, and make weird observational tweets about stuff that goes on during the day. I may not have time to write an article about a cool news item, but I can find the time to compose a <140-character tweet. Follow me there if you’re into that sort of thing. The more followers I get, the more active my presence on Twitter will be. 

I have a few exciting ideas about where to go in the future.

The monthly movie previews will continue. Those articles give me a chance to talk about every upcoming film for the entire month. I enjoy waxing poetic about each of the major films and pointing out some of the smaller, limited release films that you might not know about. I’ve gotten a lot of feedback about those posts, so I’m thinking that you guys enjoy them too.

I’ll be doing more film reviews. I shied away from those at first because there are so many websites and blogs that do reviews. Currently, I don’t have the opportunity to watch preview screenings of films. This means that when I write a review for a film, I basically see it Friday night (or, most often, Saturday morning), come home, write the review, and post it by the middle or end of opening weekend. Most people want their film reviews earlier than that. That being said, I’ve gotten a lot of comments on the review pieces I’ve written, so obviously you guys are reading them. I’ll do more of them. I’m trying to get access to preview screenings, which will hopefully speed up that process.

I have a couple of ideas for articles that I plan to start running. They won’t be regular entries, just periodic articles on things that I find interesting and think you might like too. One will be about actors/directors/writers to watch. It will highlight people in the industry who are working on cool projects that you might want to know about. I’ll also start doing a few lists, in case you ever wondered about my favorite horror films or comic book movies or Mel Gibson action flicks. Some of these lists will be predictable, others will be quirky. Hopefully they will all be fun.

There are a few other changes in the works that will be pretty major if/when I can get the details worked out. I’m looking forward to sharing them with you when it all comes together. Rest assured that the next year of The Xiphister will be exciting.

Now, I want to hear your thoughts on ways to improve the site. What sorts of things do you want to see on here? What am I doing right and what am I doing wrong? I’m always trying to get better at this, and your feedback can go a long way.

Thank you!

Texas Chainsaw 3D Poster

There's another film in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre series coming next January, but it's kind of a weird sequel. The film is a continuation from the 1974 original, ignoring the various sequels and reboots from over the years. They also are taking the odd step of calling the film simply Texas Chainsaw 3D, dropping the all-important Massacre from the title.

Here is the plot synopsis and a new poster, which appeared on Fangoria.

Lionsgate's TEXAS CHAINSAW 3D continues the legendary story of the homicidal Sawyer family, picking up where Tobe Hooper's 1974 horror classic left off in Newt Texas, where for decades people went missing without a trace. The townspeople long suspected the Sawyer family, owners of a local barbeque pit, were somehow responsible. Their suspicions were finally confirmed one hot summer day when a young woman escaped the Sawyer house following the brutal murders of her four friends. Word around the small town quickly spread, and a vigilante mob of enraged locals surrounded the Sawyer stronghold, burning it to the ground and killing every last member of the family - or so they thought.

Decades later and hundreds of miles away from the original massacre, a young woman named Heather learns that she has inherited a Texas estate from a grandmother she never knew she had. After embarking on a road trip with friends to uncover her roots, she finds she is the sole owner of a lavish, isolated Victorian mansion. But her newfound wealth comes at a price as she stumbles upon a horror that awaits her in the mansion's dark cellars...

Yeah. The face masks aren't creepy at all. I wonder if we'll be seeing this in theater lobbies or if it will be considered a bit too much for a general audience. Here's hoping that the story can do justice as a direct sequel to Hooper's 1974 masterpiece, that the 3D works well, and that they bring back Massacre to the title. 

We'll find out January 4th, 2013.

Are you clamoring for your own copy of this poster to hang on your bedroom wall, you sicko? Let me know in the comments below or on Twitter! 

Premium Rush Review

I love a good chase film. You know the type – think Apocalypto. There’s a good guy on a mission to get from point A to point B, and there’s a bad guy doing everything he can to stop him. The good guy tries to outwit and outrun the bad guy, and the bad guy tries to lay traps to keep the good guy from making it to his objective. It's a cat-and-mouse game. When done right, these types of films are smart, fast-paced, and thrilling.

I’m happy to say that Premium Rush is a very good chase film.

The story follows a bike messenger (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) who must deliver a mysterious package across Manhattan while being pursued by a cop (Michael Shannon). Along the way, we are introduced to a collection of interesting characters, have a fast-paced tour through New York City, and are treated to non-stop action.

JGL is great as usual as Wilee, a charming and intelligent guy who prefers to risk life and limb as a bike messenger rather than do grown up stuff. Michael Shannon puts in a fun performance as Bobby, the cop who is having a very bad day and desperately tries to get the package from Wilee. These guys share most of the screen-time, and it’s fun to watch them dive into the cat-and-mouse gamesmanship. All the support roles, mostly Type-A personality bike messengers zipping about the city, are capably acted.

The real star of the film, however, is someone who never makes it on screen. Writer/director David Koepp does a masterful job on this film. There are a few important elements of a great chase film. And Koepp nails most of them.

The first is pacing. The film has to start fast, and it can never waiver. Koepp uses a non-linear approach to achieve this. Essentially, we are treated to cool little action bits, and by jumping around through the narrative, Koepp lets us piece together the details and grasp the magnitude of the chase. It’s a risky move as too much jumping around can leave us lost or disoriented. Koepp chooses the breaks wisely, and good editing actually ratchets up the intensity of the film with each of these time changes. In a nice touch, an actual clock dialing backward and forward signifies each change so we’re never lost in the timeline. This approach means that the action is nearly constant. We don’t waste twenty minutes at the beginning of the movie setting up dominoes; they’re already falling when the movie starts. I should also note that the film is only 91 minutes long, which is very short in today’s Hollywood. This means the film doesn’t linger on any one plot point before moving on to the next story beat. A fast pace is a good pace, especially when each of the story elements is this well organized.

Another important element is geography. We have to know where each of the players is and where they are going at all times, especially when the timeline changes throughout the film. Things could be very disorienting otherwise. Koepp handles geography directly by showing us what are essentially glamorized Google Maps. Stylish animations zoom around a map of Manhattan showing us where each character currently is located, where they must go, and the path they must take to get there. It’s effective, it looks slick, and it goes a long way to keep us on the same page with the characters. It never feels like we’re lost.

Tw guys having one very bad day

Solid action also is an element of a good chase film. Riding bikes may not have the same appeal as high-speed car chases, but I’d wager that weaving a bicycle at breakneck speed through Manhattan traffic is as nerve wracking as racing an Audi through Paris streets. The risk and danger are there. JGL had several stunt doubles on the film and still went to the hospital for stitches. The action, which showcases just how crazy bike messengers must be to do their job, is intense and keeps your eyes glued to the screen. Plus, Koepp mixes up several different and interesting camera angles so that it’s not the same viewpoints over and over.

In the end, it’s the final element of the chase film blueprint that misses the mark ever so slightly and keeps Premium Rush from being a masterpiece. The stakes of the chase must be high from the beginning. However, we don’t know the magnitude of the stakes until very late in Premium Rush. Sure, we know that delivering the package is important to Wilee since he’s the best delivery guy in the city and his pride dictates it gets there on time. We don’t know much about the contents of the package until halfway through the film. More importantly, we don’t know what the contents actually signify until the final act of the film. To be fair, the reasons are interesting and compelling and we root for the package to be delivered on time. It’s just that unveiling the reality of the situation so late makes most of the film seem like a childhood game. It’s Wilee saying “I’ll deliver the package and you can’t stop me” and Bobby saying “I can too stop you.” It would have been nice to know how important the package delivery was for all the people involved earlier in the movie.

There are many things done very well in Premium Rush. The story is fun, the characters are great, the action is intense, it’s easy to follow, and there’s a surprising amount of humor and heart to the film. It’s not quite the perfect chase film, but it comes very close.

4 out of 5 stars

Does Premium Rush make inspire you to grab your Schwinn and give it a cruise around the block? Let me know in the comments below or on Twitter!

Lincoln movie poster

Steven Spielberg. Daniel Day-Lewis. Abraham Lincoln.

Three names synonymous with greatness. A great film director, a great actor, and a great President of the United States of America.

Spielberg has been trying to get his Lincoln biopic off the ground for several years. He has incorporated aspects of Lincoln’s life into several of his films already, most notably in the “Letter to Mrs. Bixby”, which formed a dramatic component in Saving Private Ryan. We will finally be seeing Spielberg's vision of Lincoln navigating the final days of the Civil War, which were certainly some of the most important and stressful days in U.S. History. There are few things as exciting as seeing a master filmmaker take on one of his passion projects.

Even better is who he cast as Lincoln.

Daniel Day-Lewis, who of course has a couple of best actor Oscars on his mantle, takes on the titular role. He’s known as a deep method actor who really gets in to his characters and wants to live their lives. He didn’t go all-out during production of Lincoln (he’s been known to maintain a character’s accent even when off set), but Spielberg and the crew did refer to him as “Mr. President” during shooting. He’s very, very good, and having him as Lincoln must surely tickle Spielberg’s fancy.

Plus, he looks the part judging from the first poster from the film.

He certainly looks presidential. I like this poster a lot. It’s simple, elegant, artful, and calls to mind the greatness and the burdens of Lincoln the man. The film hits November 16.

Seven Psychopaths Trailer

Who here considers themselves fans of In Bruges? I hope everyone.

The 2008 action-comedy starring Colin Farrell as a hitman hiding out in Bruges, Belguim while waiting for orders from his mob boss is a very fun film. It is full of unexpected and delightfully dark moments, wild characters, and a surprising amount of heart for a film about a couple of murderers. Bump it up your Netflix queue.

The writer/director behind In Bruges is back with a new film, and the premise is just as zany as you might expect. It’s called Seven Psychopaths, and it centered on a couple of dognappers who steal the local mob bosses prized Shih Tzu. Chaos and hilarity ensue.

Who are the seven psychopaths?

• Colin Farrell
• Sam Rockwell
• Woody Harelson
• Tom Waits
• Abbie Cornish
• Olga Kurylenko
• Christopher Walken

How’s that for a lineup?

Here’s the trailer giving some indication of the madness that hits on October 12:

Looks fun to me! 

The Last Stand trailer

Just yesterday I shared my excitement over Arnold Schwarzenegger making his return to a starring role in an action film. The film is titled The Last Stand, and I should have waited one more day to wax poetic on my favorite action movie star. Why? Because now there is an awesome trailer.

I must say, it looks rather fun. It won’t be the high point of 21st century cinema, and I doubt it will make any ‘best of’ lists at the end of 2013. But, it definitely looks to be a great time when it releases on January 18. 

Schwarzenegger's Last Stand

I love me some Arnold Schwarzenegger. I grew up on a steady diet of his action films from the 80s, 90s, and early 00s. I count Terminator 2 as one of my favorite films of all time, in large part because it stars Arnold (brilliant story and direction are also pluses). I dare you to imagine any other actor in that role and have the film be as good.

His post-governor film career is one that has me very interested. After so many years away from the business, can he still do it? He was never renowned for his acting chops; it was always his imposing physical presence that made him a star. He’s been in politics for several years, and time, as it does for all of us, is catching up with the man. Will being away from acting essentially since 2003 affect him? 

His first starring role since Terminator 3 back in 2003 will be in The Last Stand. The plot synopsis and first poster have been released for the film, which hits on January 18, 2013.

“After leaving his LAPD narcotics post following a bungled operation that left him wracked with remorse and regret, Sheriff Ray Owens (Schwarzenegger) moved out of Los Angeles and settled into a life fighting what little crime takes place in the sleepy border town Sommerton Junction. But that peaceful existence is shattered when Gabriel Cortez (Eduardo Noriega), the most notorious, wanted drug kingpin in the western hemisphere makes a deadly yet spectacular escape from an FBI prisoner convoy. With the help of a fierce band of lawless mercenaries led by the icy Burrell (Peter Stormare), Cortez begins racing toward the US-Mexico border at 250 mph in a specially outfitted Corvette ZR1 with a hostage in tow. Cortez’ path: straight through Sommerton Junction, where the whole of the US law enforcement, including Agent John Bannister (Forest Whitaker) will have their final opportunity to intercept him before the violent fugitive slips across the border forever. At first reluctant to become involved, and then counted out because of the perceived ineptitude of his small town force, Owens ultimately rallies his team and takes the matter into his own hands, setting the stage for a classic showdown.”

I like it. A washed up cop seeking to redeem himself against a dangerous fugitive sounds like a perfect first role for Arnold. He can be tough without being too much of a muscle-bound lunkhead. Plus, the synopsis sounds pretty cool. Maybe the film will be worth watching on top of the Arnold factor.

We’ll get a chance to see Arnold on the big screen very soon. He reprises his character Trench in The Expendables 2, which releases this weekend.

Indiana Jones on the Big Screen

Indiana Jones is coming back to the big screen and with more than one awesome theatrical experience. And no, this isn’t an announcement of the start of Indy 5 production.

Indiana Jones: The Complete Adventures is coming on Blu-ray on Tuesday, September 18. The collection will have all four films on Blu with the first three available for the first time in high-definition format. To celebrate this awesomeness, there are two theatrical experiences you should know about.

First up, Raiders of the Lost Ark in IMAX.

The film, which was originally released in the summer of 1981, recently was upconverted for the Blu-ray edition. The process went so well that Paramount and Lucasfilm decided to go full bore with it and transfer it into the IMAX format. Spielberg, who directed the film, was skeptical that Raiders would hold up for the very demanding IMAX transfer, but he had these quotes for the folks at Yahoo!

“I didn’t know if the 1981 print would stand up to a full IMAX transfer, so I came in expecting a grainy, muddy, and overly enlarged representation of the movie I had made 31 years ago. And I was blown away by the fact that it looked better than the movie I had made 31 years ago.”

“All the shadows in the earlier scenes that we shot in Hawaii were always kind of muddy anyway on 35mm, because we couldn’t schlep all of our big arc lights down into this valley. Suddenly, there was definition in the shadows, which I had never seen before. And the shadows weren’t murky and washed out; they were sharp as a tack. I sat there, I think, probably with my mouth open a little wider than it normally is.”

Raiders of the Lost Ark is one of the best adventure films of all time, and seeing it on an IMAX screen will undoubtedly be fantastic. If Spielberg is happy with the transfer, then I trust that it's good.

Check the IMAX website to see if it’s coming to a theater near you during the week of September 7-13.

If you want a more complete Indy experience in your life, check out the AMC Theaters Indiana Jones movie marathon. On Saturday, September 15, AMC Theaters will be showing all four films in order on the big screen.

$25 gets you:

• A ticket to all four films
• A limited edition poster and lanyard
• $5 off concessions for AMC Stubs members

Check the AMC site for details and to get tickets to the shows.

See you there!

Guns N' Roses take over Las Vegas

If you’ve followed my blog for very long, then you’ll know that one of my favorite bands is Guns N’ Roses. I love traveling to new and exciting cities to see them perform and have visited Chicago and New York City in the past year to see them play (read about my adventures in those cities by clicking the links).

It looks like I will be having a new Gn’R adventure soon.

Guns N’ Roses will be taking over The Joint at the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas, NV in November. They will be playing 12 dates from October 31 to November 24, mostly on Wednesday and the weekends.

Tickets range from a $250 VIP package that includes one general admission ticket, a lithograph, a laminate, and a meet and greet with members of the band to $65 balcony seats. Guess which package I just got.

The meet and greets are pretty cool from what I understand. Axl, who is of course the face of band, doesn’t generally stick around for long, but the other members of the band typically hang out for a while. It’s a chance to rub elbows with legit rock stars for a few hours.

Here is the list of show dates:

Wednesday, October 31 (Halloween shows are predictably crazy. Dress up!)

Friday, November 2

Saturday, November 3

Wednesday, November 7

Friday, November 9

Saturday, November 10

Wednesday, November 14

Saturday, November 17

Sunday, November 18

Wednesday, November 21

Friday, November 23

Saturday, November 24

Here is the link to the band’s site where you can buy tickets.

Tourism to Vegas in general is down from previous years. That means you can score flights and stay at a fairly nice hotel for reasonable rates. Since the shows are a couple of months out, there is plenty of time to make plans. I actually saw these guys perform at The Joint in Las Vegas back in 2001. It was my first Gn’R concert and my first time away in a strange city by myself, so that will be a hard experience to match. But, I’ve never met any of the band, so that’s going to be sweet.

Early sale is on now for fans of the band, and the general public sale starts Friday, August 17, 2012 at 10am.

Let me know in the comments below or on Twitter if you’re going. Specifically if you’re going on November 17.

Necomimi Brainwave Cat Ears

I saw a crazy article about this on Yahoo/LiveScience and had to do some digging.

A company out of Japan (naturally) has created a set of wearable cat ears that react to the wearers brain activity. When you are excited, the ears stand up, when really excited, they give a little wiggle, and when you are relaxed, they lay flat.

Seriously. They are selling these.

As far as I an tell, they only come in white, which is too bad for people like me who own orange cats. I can only imagine how freaked out my cat would be if I put these on and played with her fuzzy snake. Not cool Dad, not cool. Then again, I'm guessing my office mate at school might freak out too if I was chilling at my desk wearing a set of these.

The ears will only set you back $99, which is almost worth it to freak out my cat and everyone else I know.

Here is the hilarious video from the Necomimi website. If you want to buy yourself (or me!) a pair of these babies, then visit the company website here.

If you do purchase a set of these, you better tell me about it in the comments below or on Twitter!

The Master posters and trailers

Paul Thomas Anderson is a fantastic director who has given us some of the best character-driven films of the past fifteen years. Films like Boogie Nights and There Will Be Blood are large scope dramas in which many characters have sweeping and compelling story arcs. They are very entertaining if you like your films to have a literary feel to them. Anderson is also a technically sound director with a full bag of tricks up his sleeve. He’s been compared to Scorsese, Truffaut, Renoir, and Altman. That’s fine company for a guy who dropped out of NYU’s film school after two days.

It’s been five years since Anderson had a film in theaters. He wrote and directed There Will Be Blood, which was nominated for eight Oscar’s and won two, including a best acting award for its star Daniel Day Lewis. Anderson received nominations for writing, directing, and motion picture of the year. Yeah it was good.

Anderson has a new film coming out in 2012 called The Master, and it sounds amazing. He wrote and directed the film, which stars Philip Seymour Hoffman, Joaquin Phoenix, and Amy Adams. The story centers around a leader of a faith-based organization (Hoffman) and a young WWII veteran (Phoenix) who falls under his wing. Word on the street is that the story is a take on L. Ron Hubbard and Scientology, which I bet gives Anderson lots of room to develop his characters.

Recently, a couple of posters and a trailer have hit the web.

That’s a director who knows what he’s doing. I love that the posters have a very unusual style to them. The bug-eyed one is interesting yet a little scary. Cool. I can’t wait to see Phoenix go to town as the burned out Navy veteran. It looks like he’s doing some amazing stuff here. And as always, Hoffman looks to be bringing his A-game.

Additionally, here are a couple of shorter, more intimate clips I stumbled across that came out a few months ago. You can tell both of these actors are going to be nominated for all kinds of awards next year, because these scenes are spectacular. 

Get excited for September 21, 2012 when the film is due for release.

Fired up for The Master? Are you as freaked out by the bug-eyed (but great) poster as me? Let me know in the comments below or on Twitter!

Total Recall Review

I wanted to like the 2012 version of Total Recall. I really did. I love the Arnold Schwarzenegger film from 1990, but I recognize that there are a lot of different and cool directions that a skillful filmmaker could take that story. Sadly, the new version is a highly glossed stinker of a film that is all style and no substance. It doesn’t really go anywhere or carry any message and it comes across as completely unnecessary.

The story follows Douglas Quaid (Colin Farrell) as a factory worker who is bored with a mundane life. In his factory job, he helps build a robot army to protect the wealthy Great Britain colony from terrorists from the only other colony on Earth – the low-class Australia colony. Somewhere in the film there’s supposed to be a message of class inequality and the struggle of the oppressed Australian colony standing up to the snooty British colony. Like many elements of the film, however, this element is lifeless.

Quaid decides to visit Recall, a company that specializes in implanting memories into peoples’ minds. He selects the super spy/double agent package because it seems exciting and immediately discovers he has mad skills with guns and hand-to-hand combat. He also learns that everyone he knows is out to kill him. The problem is that he isn’t quite sure if he is really doing these things or if they are implanted memories. Is he a spy, or is he strapped in a chair in Recall? Who is he really, and how does he fit into the greater scheme of colony rebellion?

What sets off following the Recall visit is a chase to get away from the cops (lead by Kate Beckinsale who plays his wife), a mission to discover his true identity, and ultimately to put and end to the problems between the colonies.

It should be a straightforward action piece, but practically everything about it falls flat. Director Len Wiseman propels the characters forward with little sense of direction or purpose. They just sort of do stuff and go places and not much of it is exciting. There is a ten-minute hovercar chase that manages to be dull. Wiseman also has too much reliance on visual flair to sell the futuristic society. Lens flare is a cool lighting effect, but c’mon Wiseman. Just because you can do a special effect doesn’t mean that you have to do it. The cities look very glossy and remind of Balde Runner. But, both Great Britain and Australia look exactly the same, and it’s hard to see the supposed class differences that are supposedly behind the conflict. I mean, when both the upper class and lower class societies look exactly alike, then what is the purpose of rebellion?

Granted, some elements of the film are cool. The palm phone thing is pretty sweet, and the way the “unlocking the key” part is handled is crafty. All of the actors put in great performances. The mediocrity of the film is not on Farrell or Beckinsale or Jessica Biel. Those guys are great. But the neat moments of the film are limited and hardly justify the time and money needed to invest in the new version of Total Recall.

The good news is that we will always have Arnie’s version to enjoy. If you want to see an engaging action film with a real story at its heart, look that one up instead. The 2012 version of Total Recall takes a great property and does practically nothing with it.

2 out of 5 stars

What did you think about Total Recall? Should I go get my head checked, or is my review about right? Let me know in the comments or on Twitter!

Movies of the Month: August 2012

August looks to close out summer with several really nice looking films spread across multiple genres. There is no single film set to dominate the month as The Dark Knight did in July. Rather, there are action, comedy, animated, horror, and kids films on deck that should provide entertainment all month long. It’s a solid month of cinema ahead.

Here is a preview of the major film releases of August 2012 with a couple of limited release films to keep an eye on.

Week of August 3, 2012

Total Recall

The Plot: Douglas Quaid is a man bored with life who visits Recall, a company that specializes in creating artificial memories for its clients. Something goes wrong (or does it?) and poor Doug finds himself embroiled in a massive conspiracy without the ability to determine if the events are real or imagined.

Who’s in it? Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale, Bryan Cranston, Jessica Biel

Ultimate Fate: Some might call this a pointless remake of the film Arnold Schwarzenegger made famous back in 1990. Surprisingly, I’m okay with it. I was a little annoyed when it was first announced, but they’ve changed the setting from Mars to Earth, spruced up the effects and action, cast hot actors and actresses in the major roles, maintained crucial story elements, and added a few things here and there. It actually feels like an honest attempt at a remake, which I can buy into. Not sure that it will be very good, but I’m okay with the attempt.

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days

The Plot: School is out for the summer, and Greg, Rowley, Rodrick and the other kids must find some way to keep themselves entertained.

Who’s in it? The stars from the previous two movies.

Ultimate Fate: Did you know that this is the third film in this franchise? They’ve been cranking out one a year since 2010, which is the pace they need to maintain with a successful kid-based franchise. The film stars and audience are growing up rapidly, so they need to churn ‘em out while they can. The first two films did respectable business at the box office pulling in $65 and $53 million respectively. I have no idea if these films are any good, but they seem to have an audience somewhere. Grab your nearest ten-year-old kid and ask them about the Diary of a Wimpy Kid franchise if you want to know more.

Where I’ll be this weekend: I loved the Arnold version of the film, and I’m curious about the new take on Total Recall. I don’t expect to love it, but maybe they do a few new and fun things with the premise to keep it entertaining.

Week of August 10, 2012

The Bourne Legacy

The Plot: Jason Bourne wasn’t the only super spy the United States trained. The fourth entry to the Bourne franchise sees a new spy take over the lead as an asset the government wants to eliminate.

Who’s in it? Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz, Edward Norton

Ultimate Fate: When I first heard that Matt Damon and Paul Greengrass, the star and director, respectively, of the previous three Bourne films would not be returning for the fourth installment, I was a little skeptical that things would work. Those two guys have been major factors in the success of the franchise, and losing them could be a significant blow. As production on the new film progressed, however, it was good news after good news. Jeremy Renner, who we saw as Hawkeye in The Avengers is rather awesome, replaces Damon in the disavowed superspy role. New director Tony Gilroy was a writer on all three previous films, and many of the ancillary characters are back reprising their roles, which will add to the sense of continuity. That’s all good. Then came the trailers, which suggest this film is a high-octane, action-packed spy thriller with the same look and feel as the other entries in the franchise. Okay. I’m sold. It looks like they may have pulled a James Bond move here by swapping leads but keeping the roots of the franchise intact.

The Campaign

The plot: Two candidates for congress in North Carolina bumble their way through the election process. To clarify - it’s a comedy, not a documentary.

Who’s in it? Will Farrell, Zach Galifianakis

Ultimate Fate: Here we have two of Hollywood’s biggest funnymen in a topical election-year comedy that might actually be funny. This film is a completely silly and over-the-top comedy that is using politics as a backdrop for zany fun. The more I think about it, the more I think this might be the perfect timing for a comedy about an election. We all know that an election is coming up later this year, but early August is too early in the process for us to be fed up over attack ads and partisan posturing. We aren’t too burned out for the concept to be funny. Contrast this film with Oliver Stone’s W., which came out in mid-October 2008 and was a “spoof” of a biography of outgoing President George W. Bush. That film was clearly a shot at the Republican Party and was meant to carry a political message. The basic gist was - the Republican Party are a bunch of idiots for backing this moron; don’t follow their stupid ways again. Heavily political, and not that funny. The Campaign looks to avoid such heavy-handed political posturing and also looks fun.

Hope Springs

The Plot: A married couple seek counseling from a therapist in Maine to help revive the spark in their marriage.

Who’s in it? Tommy Lee Jones, Meryl Streep, Steve Carell

Ultimate Fate: All relationships go through rough patches from time to time, and sometimes help is needed to liven things up again. Or so I’m told. All of my relationships seem to blow up quickly and violently, and there’s usually nothing left to liven up. Anyway… this film tries to find the funny side of revitalizing a relationship. With the excellent Streep, Jones, and Carell in the leads, this could be a really fun and sweet film. Expect it to play for the older crowds, and expect it to play well.

Red Hook Summer

The Plot: A kid from suburban Atlanta spends an eye-opening summer with his deeply religious grandfather in the projects of Red Hook, Brooklyn, New York.

Who’s in it? I don’t know the actors, but the director is Spike Lee.

Ultimate Fate: It’s been a while since a Spike Lee Joint was in theaters. His last directorial feature was 2008’s Miracle at St. Anna, which was… not his best effort. Lee knows how to craft intimate, deeply personal films, though sometimes he can be a little heavy handed. This film is set in his backyard of Brooklyn, a familiar place that will allow him to focus on telling a unique story. I can’t wait to see how he portrays the struggles of a middle-class and not-particularly-religious youth who is thrust into a bible thumping church in the projects. Talk about having your worldview altered.

Where I’ll be this weekend: There are a couple of good options this week, but I’ll be geared up for The Bourne Legacy. I can’t wait to see the new direction of the franchise. I’ll keep an eye out for Red Hook Summer too, but I doubt it makes it to my corner of the world anytime soon.

Week of August 17, 2012

The Expendables 2

The Plot: Blowing up more stuff than the first film! If you want to get technical, it’s about a gang of mercenaries trying to stop the sale of nuclear weapons. But, really, this film is nothing but an excuse for the use of extreme pyrotechnics.

Who’s in it? Testosterone! Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Chuck Norris, Terry Crews, Liam Hemsworth, Randy Couture, Jean Claude Van Damme, Bruce Willis, and last but not least, Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Ultimate Fate: Awesome! The first Expendables came out of nowhere in 2010 to provide an action-packed bro-fest of gunfights, fistfights, car chases, explosions, bulging biceps, and all manner of manly manliness. It brought together a crazy awesome collection of 80s action stars under one roof and put them to task in a film weak on story but strong on action. It was great. How do you follow up such an insane film? As the poster says, by going bigger and badder. They brought in more 80s stars and upped the action. Yeah. I’m excited for this one.

ParaNorman

The plot: Norman can see dead people. In fact, some of his best friends are dead people. When an ancient curse threatens to destroy his town, Norman must face off against a terrifying collection of undead creatures.

Who’s in it? The voices of Kodi Smit-McPhee, Anna Kendrick, and others

Ultimate Fate: This is a stop-motion film with a unique and interesting visual style. It also tackles a subject matter that might be too scary for its intended audience. Some of the creature designs and set pieces from the trailers have looked pretty scary for younger members of the audience. I hope that the uniqueness of the film isn’t overwhelmed by the frights. Those who enjoyed The Nightmare Before Christmas or Corpse Bride should be interested.

Sparkle

The Plot: Three sisters form a Motown group in the 1960s and must learn to deal with the fallout of fame.

Who’s in it? Jordin Sparks, Whitney Houston, Carmen Ejogo

Ultimate Fate: The ladies of Motown certainly could belt out some tunes. This film is most noticeable because it was supposed to be part of Whitney Houston’s return to the spotlight. Instead, I think this will now be her last role in a film. It’s a musical, so there’s that.

Where I’ll be this weekend: As a lifelong Whitney Houston fan, I’m super duper exited for Sparkle. Yeah right. If you have to ask where I’ll be this weekend, then clearly you don’t know how manly I am. Expendables 2 for the ‘splosions.

Week of August 24, 2012

Premium Rush

The Plot: A bike messenger is chased through New York City by an assorted collection of bad guys over a package he was given to deliver.

Who’s in it? Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Michael Shannon

Ultimate Fate: Think The Transporter on bicycles with less martial arts. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it will take a lot to duplicate the intensity of a great Statham actioner without crazy fights. Maybe fist- and gunfights are in Premium Rush, but as much as I love JGL, I don’t buy him kung-fuing bad guys all over the place. Still, writer/director David Koepp is pretty good, and the cast seems pretty good too. Maybe they can put us on the edge of our seats with a crazy romp through the city. The life of a bike messenger does seem intense.

The Apparition

The Plot: A group of ghost hunters accidentally awaken an actual ghost who then haunts/kills them. Oops.

Who’s in it? Ashley Greene, Sebastian Stan, Tom Felton, Julianna Guill

Ultimate Fate: Well, Halloween is right around the corner, so I guess it’s time for some scary flicks to hit theaters. I’m sure I’ll be rooting for the ghost in this one. If the humans were dumb enough to awaken a ghost and attract its attention, then they get whatever they get. It’s also a found footage film, so I’ll be annoyed by shaky-cam and wanting to see someone other than me suffer.

Where I’ll be this weekend: I will see anything involving JGL, so I’ll be at Premium Rush with fingers crossed that it’s actually exciting.

Week of August 31, 2012

The Possession

The Plot: A little girl opens a magic box that unleashes a malevolent spirit who possesses her.

Who’s in it? Natasha Calis, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Kyra Sedgwick

Ultimate Fate: This is a horror film based heavily in Jewish lore. I don’t know if that’s significant, but there seems to be a lot of crazy cool stuff going on in the trailers that I don’t quite understand. It’s time the Catholics stood aside and let a different religion tell a horror story for once. The film itself looks derivative of many other horror films, but maybe it will be different enough to entertain.

Where I’ll be this weekend: Wait. Only one wide release this weekend? Another film, Lawless, which has a lot of big stars and would have been a big draw for the weekend got pushed back to the spring. Either watch a horror film or catch up on some of the other releases of the month.

Movie of the Month: If you only see one film this month, make it The Bourne Legacy. It will offer all the action and thrills you can handle. As much as I would like to trumpet The Expendables 2 this month, that one will only play to the guys. The Bourne Legacy will be the whole package.

Are you psyched for The Bourne Legacy or are you going all-out with The Expendables 2? Or does something else catch your eye this month? Let me know in the comments below or on Twitter!