We’ve already seen what could be the highest earning film of 2012 with The Hunger Games. There won’t be many films capable of bringing in $300+ million for the remainder of the year, except for maybe The Avengers, The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit. We are still a month or so away from these other big summer films, but in the meantime, there are still some really good films hitting theaters. There are a few stinkers in April, but there are some potential gems too.
Week of April 6, 2012
American Reunion
The Plot: The gang returns for their high school reunion to reminisce about the good old days and create more chaos.
Who’s in it? Most everyone from the previous three films.
Ultimate Fate: Notice how I said in the introduction that there are some stinkers this month? Here’s one of them. Why they made another one of these, I’m not sure. It is nice that they ignore the various direct-to-video spin-off films (didn’t those follow the misadventures of Stiffler’s brother?) and stick to a story following the original characters. The premise doesn’t seem too forced since these characters are due for a class reunion. However, given the generally terrible original films, I can’t imagine this sequel being that great.
Titanic 3D
The plot: The boat sinks. Spoilers!
Who’s in it? Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet
Ultimate Fate: The film you saw six times in the theaters as a teenager returns to theaters for you to see a few more times. James Cameron has overseen the 3D conversion of his second biggest hit (and second biggest all-time with a paltry $600 million). These post-conversions seldom look spectacular, but with the maestro himself personally involved in one of his most successful creations, expect it to look good.
The Hunter (limited release)
The plot: A world-class mercenary tries to hunt down one of the last remaining Tasmanian tigers in the world so that it can be cloned.
Who’s in it? Willem Defoe
Ultimate Fate: This film encourages Defoe to turn loose his inner wildman, which is something we all can agree is a good thing. From the trailer, it looks like an interesting setup involving action, corporate espionage, and even some sci-fi.
Where I’ll be this weekend: If The Hunter is anywhere near me, I’ll be there. Otherwise, I’ll stand outside the American Reunion theater and punch the idiots going to see that dumb film. Seriously, don’t give that series your money; it could encourage them to make more even more sequels.
Week of April 13, 2012
The Cabin in the Woods
The Plot: A group of friends head off for a weekend in the woods only to find that their rustic cabin isn’t what it seems.
Who’s in it? Bradley Whitford, Chris Hemsworth
Ultimate Fate: I’ve been hearing great things about this film. It’s a horror/thriller that takes the cabin-in-the-woods premise and goes off in a unique direction. The film has actually been sitting around for a few years while the studio worked out a release strategy. They were attempting a post-conversion 3D treatment for a while but decided against it, preferring to leave the final cut alone. Not much has gotten out about the story since the producers are don’t want to ruin the film, which means that I’ll enter this film somewhat blindly. I’m excited to see what the buzz is all about.
The Three Stooges
The Plot: Larry, Moe, and Curly get into misadventures while trying to save the orphanage in which they were raised.
Who’s in it? Sean Hayes, Chris Diamantopoulos, Will Sasso
Ultimate Fate: There was a time when the stars of this film were to be Benicio del Toro, Sean Penn, and Jim Carey. How different that film would have been! Those stars all officially dropped out due to “scheduling conflicts”, but having seen the atrocious trailer for this one, I’m betting they backed out after reading the script. I saw the trailer and am still waiting to laugh. This film appears to be comedy anti-matter.
Lockout
The Plot: Convicts take over a prison orbiting Earth. One man is selected to break into the prison to rescue the president’s daughter who happens to be visiting the station.
Who’s in it? Guy Pearce, Maggie Grace
Ultimate Fate: This one is billing itself as Taken in space. A sci-fi take on the rescue/revenge genre sounds good to me. The trailer looks decent if not spectacular. Luc Besson is a producer on the film, so there should be some decent action pieces to keep you entertained.
Where I’ll be this Weekend: Cabin in the Woods all the way. I’m down for a fresh take on a fun horror genre. I just found out that The Raid: Redemption, the crazy-insane silat fighting film that’s been making a slow rollout across the country will be coming near me this weekend. So, yeah. I’ll be watching Indonesian dudes beat each other silly and then getting freaked out by a killer house.
Week of April 20, 2012
The Lucky One
The Plot: A Marine tracks down the woman whose photo he believes was his lucky charm while he was serving in Iraq.
Who’s in it? Zac Efron, Taylor Schilling
Ultimate Fate: Remember The Vow? Same thing here. It probably won’t do as well since The Vow came out over Valentine’s Day, but it’s the only romantic comedy out right now so it should draw.
Think Like a Man
The Plot: A relationship expert writes a tell-all book that spills the beans on all the tricks men use to lure women. Armed with this information, the ladies turn the tables.
Who’s in it? Chris Brown, Gabrielle Union, Kevin Hart, (what, no Tyler Perry?)
Ultimate Fate: Rhianna-beater Chris Brown cast as the relationship expert in a romantic comedy? I guess the producers are really stretching the concept of comedy. That weird stunt casting is likely to turn off a big segment of the female audience, which is a big deal in a rom-com.
Chimpanzee
The Plot: A young chimp gets separated from his mother and then gets adopted by an adult male.
Who’s in it? Our furry cousins, narrated by Tim Allen
Ultimate Fate: Documentarians from Discovery spent years in the Ivory Coast tracking and filming chimpanzees and were witness to a rather incredible story. When the little guy lost his mother, an adult male took him under his wings and cared for him. I don’t think that behavior had ever been witnessed before. Cool stuff.
Where I’ll be this weekend: I’ll be in the field collecting fishes. Since, you know, I’m a marine biologist by day and a film aficionado by night. Good thing none of these movies really gets my juices flowing.
Week of April 27
The Five Year Engagement
The Plot: The film tracks the ups and downs of an engaged couple over five years. Seriously? Five years? What exactly is the hold-up?
Who’s in it? Jason Segel, Emily Blunt
Ultimate Fate: Another week, another rom-com. Why not? I’ve known people who were engaged for a long time before marriage, but I’m not one of them. I guess there could be some funny moments with that concept, but I can’t really think of any. Someone else might enjoy it though.
The Raven
The Plot: A killer uses the writings of Edgar Allen Poe as a template for a string of murders.
Who’s in it? John Cusack
Ultimate Fate: There’s an interesting trend coming out of Hollywood of taking popular historical figures and telling a fake story about them. We saw it last year (well, a few people saw it) with Anonymous, which postulated that Shakespeare didn’t write anything and was a front in the battle between church and crown. We’ll see it again later this year with Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. I always thought Poe was an opium addict and depressed loner, but The Raven considers him to be a capable crime fighter when he’s called to service by the police. Interesting take. I hope it ends with a take on The Tell-Tale Heart with the killer confessing everything out of guilt.
The Pirates! Band of Misfits
The Plot: An inept pirate sets out with his crew to win the Pirate of the Year Award.
Who’s in it? The voices of Hugh Grant, Salma Hayek
Ultimate Fate: Aardman Animations are known for making cute and awesome claymation films, most notably with the characters Wallace and Gromit. They know how to weave a heartwarming and funny story and top it off with a unique visual aesthetic. Saying this film will be good is equivalent to saying Pixar’s next film will be good. With Aardman involved, you know this will be great for the whole family.
Safe
The Plot: A cop saves a savant-like Chinese girl who knows a safe code and is being pursued by Russians and Triads.
Who’s in it? Jason Statham, of course
Ultimate Fate: It’s been a few months since we last saw Statham in theaters, so here he is again beating up a fresh batch of people. This time he gets to save a little girl! I personally love Statham. His films are more about car chases, gunfights, and fistfights than they are about character, and I’m glad he puts out a film every six months.
Where I’ll be this Weekend: I’ll be watching the Aardman film and then stopping in to see Statham kick someone’s teeth out the back of their skull.
Movie of the Month: There are a few good options this month, but I’ll recommend most highly The Cabin in the Woods. A fresh take on a familiar horror genre is definitely worth my time. Barring that, The Pirates! Band of Misfits is sure to be fun for all age groups.
Thanks for reading the previews! I hope you see something in there you like. Let me know in the comments below and follow me on Twitter!
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